“The victim mindset dilutes the human potential. By not accepting personal responsibility for our circumstances, we greatly reduce our power to change them.” — Steve Maraboli
Why do we keep forgetting this?
This isn’t the first time you hear about this. But do you find yourself blaming someone else for feeling hurt, sad, disappointed, overwhelmed, and for the loss of a day/weekend/life?
The tossing blame escalates and before you know it, you are blaming others for your lack of productivity, sleep, exercise, poor diet, direction, and on and on. It’s all their fault.
“If they would be more/less….”
“There’s not a chance we’ll reach our full potential until we stop blaming each other and start practicing personal accountability.” — John Miller, QBQ
“Full potential” John Miller? Whoa, don’t get too carried away; we are not even talking FULL potential here; honestly, we may be lucky to reach mediocrity if we are not assuming full responsibility of our lives now; period; forget about full potential, that is another level altogether where the habit of blaming others for our stuff is not even a dot in the rearview mirror.
If we are stuck in a loop of blaming people, circumstances or institutions for our life, we have no future other than the same, (and eventually it gets worse), unless we snap out of that stupidity.
We cannot circumvent this requirement if we are to succeed and experience growth and life satisfaction.
We Have to take ABSOLUTE RESPONSIBILITY for the Condition and Situation of Our Lives
This space is scary because it can get tricky in some situations, but the rule demonstrates that it applies across the spectrum of circumstance.
Some people (most people), resist taking this step forever, and will rather be powerless victims to whom stuff happens.
“The final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands.”— Anne Frank
All this can sound harsh, but not taking full responsibility of everything in our lives is like having big holes on the floor of our boats; you have to keep bucketing the water out, and all your energy goes into keeping your boat afloat, never mind where the boat is headed, you cannot do everything at once; you either are a victim and handle the energy loss of being victimized, or you take responsibility and use all that energy in the service of YOU, to boost your purpose, to pursue your passion, to be bold and brave; adventurous and awesome.
Awesome people have also suffered and been victimized, but they said “hell no”, “I will not be a victim, that’s not who I am going to be; I am going to be empowered and I will dictate the value and weight I give things”.
— So my parents abandoned me? If they hadn’t I wouldn’t have met the awesome people I met.
— My ex cheated on me? That relationship was over anyway; it gave me the push I needed to move forward.
— I got that scary experience? (fill in the blank), it showed me things about life and myself I didn’t know, and how much I want to live it on the terms that are true for my heart.
Taking TOTAL responsibility of everything in our lives is one of the most empowering decisions we can make.
You aren’t the only one for whom this may be harsh and difficult, it is harsh and difficult for a lot of us, but that one single act of stepping UP is pregnant with possibility.
Feeling Like a Victim is Not an Option
A fully responsible adult who can make choices and take risks isn’t one who feels like a victim.
You reinvent yourself because stagnation is not acceptable.
We can forget and fall into the pit of blaming again
When we feel stuck maybe the first thing we should ask ourselves is:
“Who am I blaming of what?”
“If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.” — Theodore Roosevelt
When the student is ready, the teacher will appear, and when our hearts are open, the universe collaborates.
Call to Action:
Copyrighted material 2018